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The Green Eyed Monster: Intimidation, Jealousy + Your Biz

When I was a little girl I loved reading The Garden Gang books.

If you were a 70’s/80’s child like me you may remember them too, check them out>>

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The stories were simple tales about a group of garden vegetables who hung out, and they were published by Ladybird.

Even back then, at the age of 6 or 7, I was aware that the little girl who wrote them had achieved something I hadn’t yet.

The face of Jayne Fisher smiled at me on the back cover of these books, and that feeling of green eyed monster stirred somewhere in my psyche.

She had published a book. Not just one, but a WHOLE SERIES!

And what I had I done, eh? Psssht.

 

As it happens, I did start my first business at the age of 8, but still, I had been outdone.  Jayne Fisher and her smug smile had the upper hand.

This feeling of being out done, of not being good enough is something we as entrepreneurs come up against during our journey.

I will admit I have felt the pangs of jealousy too, despite my own successful business, and it’s part of being human and ambitious I think.

 

Doubt will come and niggle.

You might feel useless.

You might stay playing small instead of spreading your wings and risking failure.

 

The online communities in which I frequent has had a buzz around the INCREDIBLE recent launch success of the lovely Kimra Luna; so much so, in fact, that a blog post was doing the rounds to dispel the myths (and jealous glances) around her launch.

Intrigued to hear how others feel about watching our peers rise to the top, I reached out to some Divas and Dudes for their thoughts:

“Not afraid to admit that yes I get insanely jealous sometimes! It’s nothing to do with the person in question but more that I see them doing something I know I could EASILY teach myself so I start to think – why not me? I should be making good money like that etc etc. I usually end up paralysed by fear of being called a copycat if I offer my own take on the same type of product and that’s where I usually get caught. I think it’s just learning to accept that the higher you position yourself you’ll always get haters and as long as what I’m offering is authentically me then that’s all that matters.”
Anon

“Seeing others succeed gives me hope that I can get there too. Although, I have to admit, sometimes it can be challenging to avoid the green-eyed monster around those people that seem to have the perfect life, with opportunities with seemingly no effort. But those entrepreneurs that acknowledge their struggles and come out on top anyway? They are my inspiration. ”
Daire Paddy Openwaydesigns.com

“I definitely get the biz green monster, but I realise that any kind of jealously is because someone else’s achievements are pressing on one of my issues if that makes sense! Usually when I feel jealous it’s because I’m missing something in my biz, or because I’m not confident enough in what I’m doing. Something that has really helped me is focusing on my own version of success, often I find myself getting the green monster for things that I wouldn’t even want in reality!”
Anon

“I do, [get the green eyed monster],  but I see it as a positive thing as it helps me to focus on my goals by reaffirming what it is that I want to achieve and I celebrate those successes as real examples of what is possible. I do have to be measured about it though, as sometimes it can all lead to a bit of overwhelm in terms of a crisis in confidence and feelings of am I good enough.”
Nicola  www.bellenoirloves.com

“Nope. I get the OMGosh, that is so fantastics!!!! It fuels the fire to know that with the right perseverance, talent, desire, and tenacity to succeed, this online marketing world absolutely works!” Anon

“Of course I get green-eyed about others’ success from time to time. Anyone says that they don’t, at least for a second or two, is in denial at best, and possibly delusional. It’s a natural, human emotion, and there’s no need to suppress it. Suppressing and denying so-called “bad” emotions is rampant in the women business communities, and it’s keeping us all down. Just say, “Hello, Old Friend, where can we go from here?” and use it to inspire your own success.  I’m currently in a group where most people make several million dollars a year. In fact, I make the LEAST of anyone in the room. We all openly talk about both rooting for one another and occasionally getting a smidge jealous. We know it’s part of human nature. We laugh about it, cry about it, and hug one another through it together. And then we all go out to do and be the very best that we can be. ”
Michelle Amethyst Mahoney,  Spiritual Badass

” I am so happy when I see a fellow entrepreneur succeed, for I am confident about my own ability to make my biz work for me.” Anon

So, do you ever feel the burn of the green eyes? Do you have the Garden Gang gripes about being pipped to the post?

Here is my advice:

– Remember that everyone starts somewhere (even the biggies).

– If it’s really an issue for you, just get out of groups/emails for a bit and revel in your own awesome creations.

– Talk it out with your coach/mentor/mastermind group.

– Use the success of another to make you realise that’s possible, and re-focus your energy and attention towards YOUR biz.

 

Let’s lose the intimidation and jealousy and rock on with your own story.

Remember, YOU ARE ENOUGH.

 

I am enough. Losing the green eyed monster with @dexdiva

 

Stay Super,

josignature

 

Jo Gifford

My work is about helping people work in smarter, creative ways + getting their message out to the world via killer content—blogs, copy, images + social. I am a designer, writer, blogger, mentor, author, creativity addict + prolific geek. You could call it a portfolio career of multi-potential multi-passions. I call it being me.
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