The ups and downs of empathy
So, last night I ran 9 miles. Massive achievement for me, so pleased and proud.
Today I am in pain, it’s fairly bad but bearable and I need to rest.
So, that means plans have to change. As always, I need to be aware of my limitations and go with the flow.
Sadly, not everyone understands this, and it happens often. A friend today said she gives up on me for cancelling “again” .
Well, give up.
As I told the person concerned, I cancel, friends, family, clients, colleagues, when I need to. It’s not nice, I hate doing it and over the years I have worked hard to drop the associated guilt. If people think I am a flake, so be it. Try having young toddlers, living in pain and still smiling.
If I had to be somewhere super super urgently and was able to walk then I would push myself to go and pay for it for the next 3 days afterwards. This is what people don’t understand about a chronic illness – I know what I am managing, I know how to deal with it and if you don’t understand? Not my problem, I got enough already and I am dealing with them thanks very much.
I suppose people see my running updates and are confused by the fact I can do that one day and not the next. Well, it’s the way I live my life and I am happy to talk about it so people understand, but I am not going to continue to apologise.
So, any one else want to tell me how crap I am today? It’s an open forum 
DD
x
5 People have left comments on this post
Hmm…a friend said that?? I think not! Merely an individual with limited imagination and a lack of empathy.
Its all about the management – not only of the pain, but also the pain caused by the inevitable payback of missing out!
Keep on Hon…. xxx
Ha, and I KNOW you know this one! xxx
I’m sorry but a true friend never gives up. I don’t suffer from endo but i can appreciate and share a lot of other difficulties you face.Life gets in the way sometimes and you can only do what feels right and should never be made to feel less worthy than the amazing person you are. Real friends can be hard to finds, they are like diamonds in the rough xxx
I LOVE this new attitude lady. Less guilt, maybe a couple of less so called ‘friends’ but a Jo that is managing endo AND running marathons. You rock lady! And crap is not a word I would use to describe you EVER. The word that best describes you is inspirational xxxxx
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